More Change Coming
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How are you guys doing? What are your external and internal worlds throwing at you these days? It seems important to check in at this moment of shift and change. The end of the year is coming, the end of Trump’s presidency is on the horizon, and the first rollout of the vaccine is underway, a harbinger of the end of the pandemic. Who knows what that actually means. I thought I would be overjoyed when vaccinations started happening, so I’m surprised to find that it’s bringing a new kind of anxiety to my already excessive allostatic load (the negative impact on the body from exposure to repeated stressors, like pandemics and evil orange imps and all of 2020).
I’ve gotten used to living in a pandemic. Even though it sucks, I’ve grown accustomed to this increased level of stress, as well as all the little ways I try to keep it in check (Brit Box and chocolate). The idea of the end of the pandemic brings me face to face with all the projects and ambitions that came to a grinding halt last March. It’s been almost a year and the momentum behind all those projects is completely gone. Also, my interests have shifted and changed. Not surprising, given that the world is not the same place it was a year and, regardless of how fast vaccines roll out, will never go back to the way it was. I don’t know if I can keep living where I’m living and doing what I’ve been doing. A lot of people are having to pivot (or scramble) as a result of the pandemic. And this is daunting. Hell, big stuff like career and location aside, I haven’t seen anyone in months and months. I’ve forgotten how to interact socially (not that I ever actually knew). I haven’t gotten a haircut since last February! How soon will there be pressure to brunch again?
The idea of starting up again can be overwhelming and frustrating. Who knows what challenges our strange new post-pandemic world will offer up.
Maybe I’m the only one. I am pretty good at finding things to be anxious about. NTL, just in case I’m not the only one, here’s some practical advice for heading into yet more uncertainty and change. I don’t have a clue what to do about where to live, how to earn a living, or how to reconnect with brunch, but here are a few ways to get your brain and body in the best condition to face these challenges. They’re all common sense, “duh” things that everyone talks about. I’m not even going to cite articles because you’ve probably read them all before. And if you’re like me, felt pressured because oh, I’m not good enough for sleeping 7 hours a night instead of 8. But screw that. These are the basics. We need all the support we can get these days. Do the best you can and give yourself credit for it.
Get good sleep. Turn off the devices. Go to sleep and wake up at the same time every day. Have a conversation with your cat or dog about cold noses on your face at 3 AM, and don’t count staying up late if it’s because of a book or a baby. In those cases you have no choice.
Exercise: Get outside, jump around the living room, roll around on the floor with the dog or the kid. Do 80’s cartoon character signature moves for 10 minutes straight (my favorite is He Man’s “I have the power!” pose). Just move. It helps you sleep and helps with anxiety and depression. It’s hard during the winter when the couch and the Netflix are so enticing, but you could try He Man poses for two minutes before every Netflix show. By the time you’ve watched your daily allotment of 10 shows you’ll have gotten 20 minutes of exercise in. Work the system. No self-torture allowed.
Hydrate. I hate this one, particularly in winter when drinking water makes me colder, even though winter in VT is so dry I look like that guy from the Mummy (the mummy guy). I’m trying to figure out if hot cocoa counts as hydration. Again, do what you can. Water goes a long way to making you feel less stressed.
Don’t consume too much sugar, caffeine, or alcohol. An absurd suggestion during the holiday season, and especially this holiday season. Try adding instead of subtracting. Eat fruit as well as Xmas cookies. Drink sparkling water as well as booze. Have a good breakfast with your caffeine.
Mindfulness and self-awareness practices. I have a massive chip on my shoulder about the old “try meditating and journaling” piece of advice. And yet, cliches are cliches for a reason. Seek out trauma-informed mindfulness practices. That trauma-informed label is VERY important. Not always a guarantee but a step in the right direction. Also, the Three Good Things Exercise is a good alternative to the generic “practice gratitude” admonition.
As ever, strengthen those social connections. If you’re a pre-pandemic isolator like me, give yourself the tiny wins (like waving to a neighbor or Skyping with a friend). If you’re an extrovert not like me, how the eff have you survived this year?
Pick one tiny thing from this list and give it a try in a very gentle way. Try it for a week, maybe two, and pay attention to how it makes you feel. That’s all. Just try, just pay attention.
Truth is, I do all of these things every day, which means I have no time left over for making a living or having a social life. Which is fine in the middle of a pandemic. Not sure how it will be once the pandemic is over, but at least I’ll be calmer and more resourced when the time comes.
Focus on doing what you can do and let the rest take care of itself. Because it will, one way or another.