Spinach
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Today’s blog includes a short piece I wrote about 20 years ago. At the time I called it a personal essay but now it feels closer to prose poetry (is that a thing?). It’s weird. Written while living in NYC, less than a year after 9/11, it’s a traumatized young person trying (and failing) to make sense of being privileged in a world full of crazy, painful shit. Twenty years later, as the world continues to spin out, I’ve discovered that I don’t like spinach very much, preferring instead arugula for my dinner salads.
Spinach
Yesterday I went to the Korean grocery store and bought a bag of spinach because I read somewhere that pear-shaped people can lose weight in their hips and thighs if they stick to a diet high in whole grains and leafy greens. I also bought an Us magazine because I wanted to look at the Oscar dresses.
Today I went to a photo exhibit in the city. Afterwards I took the bag of spinach back to the Korean grocery store because when I went to make my dinner salad I realized that the bag was held shut with clear packing tape instead of being properly sealed.
The exhibit was a series of photos taken of Burmese rebels and refugees. It was called “Something Went Wrong.” One of the photos was of a landmine victim and his caregiver. The landmine victim’s hands were missing below the elbows. His eyes were gone too. His caretaker had two hands but only one eye.
The lady behind the counter at the Korean grocery store said, “It’s okay. Nothing wrong with spinach. Happen in delivery box.”
I said, “I know it’s okay, but would you mind just replacing it with a sealed bag?” I reached for a new sealed bag with one hand and returned the taped bag with the other.
I cut a picture of Kate Winslet out of the Us magazine and glued it into my notebook. The picture was from an article on how Hollywood celebrities maintain their bodies. It’s actually two photos of Kate Winslet, a Before of her weighing 180 pounds just after her daughter was born, and an After with the caption, “How did Kate drop 56 pounds in less than a year?!”
My face got red as I mumbled “Thanks” and left the grocery store with a sealed bag of spinach. I wondered if the grocery store lady came from a place where giving up a bag of spinach because it’s not properly sealed makes no sense.
The rebels and refugees in the photos were not named so I wrote down the photographer’s name because I didn’t want to forget what I had seen. I wondered if the landmine victim’s missing forearms weigh less than 56 pounds.
I want to look like Kate Winslet in the After photo, so I’m having spinach salad for dinner.
THE END
This week’s assignment: confront some remnant or article that represents you a long time ago. What arises? Can you feel kindly towards that younger you? And this older you?